There's been a lot of talk around the Lime the past few months about the quality of customer service, and phone based support numbers. Well, I've just got to put in my two cents worth.

The world's first automatic answering machine was not invented until 1935 when Willy Müller saw that Jewish people were not allowed to answer the phone on the Sabbath and as a result may miss important calls. Willy Müller's answering machine was three feet tall and as a result, very impractical. Dr. Kazuo Hashimoto, a Phonetel employee, invented the Ansafone which, in 1960, became the first answering machine sold in America.  Source.
 

So, if we believe what we read, we've been leaving messages since-well, lets give it the benefit of the doubt-say 1970. That's over 40 years.

What grieves me is that every time I call someone and they do not answer, I have to listen to a long didactic message telling me how to leave a message. For some reason, these messages always assume that I have never left a message before in my life.
 

It often goes like this:
“Your call has been answered by an automatic answering device.” (A what?)
“The number you have called, five.....long space.....five.....long space.....five …..long space..... five.....long space.....five.....long space.....five …..long space..... five.....long space.....five.....long space.....five …..long space.....five, is not answering.” (I figured that out all by myself.)
“At the tone, leave your message. When you are finished leaving your message you may hang up....OR...press one for further options.” (Wow, you mean I can just hang up?)

Maybe it's just me, but do the Corpro-Fascist phone companies really think I am this stupid? How long will all this persist? Will we still be listining to this crap in 2025? And, does this have anything to do with the impending World Wide Economic Collapse?

Another thing about this phone stuff. Why do the people who let their machines answer their phones never put their names on the massage? I mean it would be nice to know if I have the right number before I leave my message.

And then there's this one: “The number five.....long space.....five.....long space.....five …..long space..... five.....long space.....five.....long space.....five …..long space..... five.....long space.....five.....long space.....five …..long space.....five has a voice mail box that is not set up. Good bye.” (I mean really, couldn't there be a default setup...Come on, I mean after all, this is the 90's)

Then, there's my very favorite: “The mail box of the person you are calling is full. Please try your call again later. (I think I have more storage on Google.) Do you think this means that this person NEVER listens to their messages?

Of course, beyond all that, there's the messages recorded by the owners of the phone. They just kill me some of them.
Small child's voice: “Thish ish che house of Brawdon, Shoosie, Bowb, and Anguewla. Pweesh leeb a messhage.”

The cool dude: “You know what to do.”

The promises: “Please leave your name, number, and the time you called, and we'll get right back to you.” (yea right...)

Then there's the family that includes the names of their dog.

I guess the real problem here is that in today's world, almost every human interaction with technology has to be reduced to the level of the lowest human common denominator. Anything that interacts with millions of people has to be understandable by the dumbest among us.

How did we get this way? Should I give in or fight it? Is it right for me to stand upright, walk forward at a good clip, and be irritated by the guy crawling in front of me? Am I really the stupid one here?

I invite anyne who reads this to comment with thier favorite phone message peave.