Interview with 'Jesus Lied:He was only human' author, CJ Werleman

Jake Farr-Wharton 12 comments
Interview with 'Jesus Lied:He was only human' author, CJ Werleman

CJ Werleman, author of ‘’, was interviewed by prolific atheist and incredibly sexy blogger, Jake Farr-Wharton in October 2009 on RustyLime.com. This interview remains the most commented-on article in RustyLime.com history, and while that is mainly because a handful of half-human-half-bible commentators lost control of their perception filters and became stuck in a perpetual feedback loop, it was a fun ride for professional obfuscators, of which Jake is one.

Due to a particularly lucrative deal with Lucifer (Satan’s sexually ambiguous half sister) CJ’s latest book, has been released with much critical acclaim! So much so, in fact, that CJ has had to renounce his atheism in favour of being placed among the pantheon of atheist gods.

From his new throne, and after answering my prayers, CJ has agreed to a second interview.

Jake Farr-Wharton has read this book, and personally endorses it! In the same punch, yet hilarious style as his last book, CJ has thrust the sword of truth into the gizzards that are the many lies of Jesus Christ. He critically analyses both the commentary of many of the theologians and apologists of antiquity and the scriptures themselves.

This book demolishes the position that Jesus Christ, King of the Jews and saviour of the Christians, was anything more than an apocalyptic preacher… and maybe not even that.

Now, to the interview:

You are the kind of atheist my mother used to warn me about, why do you hate god so very, very much?

Well, let’s be honest. Would you invite him to your party, with strippers and shit? There’s old Yahweh sitting in the corner watching everyone, being all-judgmental with a pen and scorecard. Kind of takes the fun out of evening, huh?

More than that, I hate the God of the Bible because he is the mirror of our species at our most ugly i.e. racist, misogynistic, xenophobic, homophobic, violent, and vengeful.

We last spoke to you late last year after your first book, “God Hates You, Hate Him Back”, was published, what have you been doing since then?

Reading, writing, blogging, twittering. That’s my life in four words or less.

Most of that time, however, has been spent completing my second book, ‘Jesus Lied. He Was Only Human’, which is a natural sequel to my first.

Occasionally, I receive an email from people I’d spoken to or debated or who had read a particularly provocative blog post of mine on religion, telling me that what I’d said/written had infuriated them at the time, but had apparently planted a seed of doubt. This kind of feedback blows my mind, but I imagine you would have had some pretty interesting comments following the sublimely provocative book that was “God Hates You, Hate Him Back”. Can you tell us some of your favourites?

I wish I could report an actual death threat, because as Christopher Hitchens commented only recently, “the person who doesn’t threaten you is the one to worry about.”

I do receive plenty of “hasta la vista in hell, baby” type of emails, or the ever condescending, “I pray for you” kind. But what really gets my goat (is that still an expression?) is being called a racist whenever I dare denounce a particular aspect of Islam (despite the fact Islam isn’t a race), or unfairly labelled an anti-Semite because I’ve said the Israeli government behaves like the Nazi overseers of the Warsaw ghettos.

I guess that’s all the part of the game, though. The opposition will always attack the messenger rather than the message, particularly when their counter argument is as weighty as OJ Simpsons was.

The title of your next book, “Jesus Lied: He was only human”, is just as inflammatory as your last book, “God Hates You, Hate Him Back”. In GHYHHB, you ripped apart the bible and showed the world that the God character is infinitely malicious and apparently does hate humanity; what evidence do you bring to the table to show that Jesus was in fact a liar?

Without trying to giveaway the ending, we have examples in the New Testament whereby Jesus lied to his followers, the teachers of the Law, the Jewish elders, and the High Priest. Much of Paul’s letters, which make up the majority portion of the Christian Bible, concern themselves with Jesus’ big whopper, the promise to return before 100 A.D, at latest.

It’s not only Jesus’ lies that I highlight; I also demonstrate the historical, theological, and geographical flaws of the so called “messiah’s” biographers, while also bringing to light the irreconcilable discrepancies between their respective accounts of Jesus birth, youth, baptism, ministry, trial, crucifixion, death, and resurrection.

The writing style is very similar to my first book, with the emphasis on entertainment rather than trying to impress the academic community with the lifeless and meaningless words, and phraseology only they use. 

What inspired you to focus on the biblical claims attributed to Jesus?

After the release of my first book, the typical Christian response went a little like this, “Oh, sure, that’s the Old Testament. But all that barbaric shit goes out the window once Jesus arrives on the scene.” Therefore, the initial inspiration for writing this book was to demonstrate that Jesus is inextricably tied to the angry, vicious, vengeful, woman loathing, gay hating, foreigner murdering Yahweh.

How much of what is attributed to Jesus in the Bible is able to be verified as a ‘factual’ account of Jesus’ life?

Based on a lack of external evidence, eyewitness testimony, conflicting Gospel accounts, and an absence of independent records – the only thing we know about Jesus, with any degree of certainty is the following:

  • He was a Palestinian Jew
  • He was raised in Galilee
  • He spent most of his life in that immediate area. A rural area, outside of the more ‘sophisticated’ Jerusalem, that practiced a primitive form of Judaism.
  • Jewish parents raised him.
  • He was circumcised as a Jew.
  • He observed all the Jewish holidays, and ceremonies
  • He lived and taught as a pious God-fearing Jew.

Other than the above, we safely conclude the remainder of his biblically reported life to be based on neighbouring mythology at worst and contradictory hearsay at best.

Was Jesus just a human?

Well, with no self-written manuscripts, an absence of birth or death certificates, no actual artefacts, or independently verifiable and external unbiased accounts of Jesus, it is very difficult to presume he really did exist. It is my sense, however, that an eccentric Jew, an apocalyptic preacher by that name, existed in or around the first century. But his life was written about at least a half-century after he died, with the campfire stories and legends tacked on later. Moreover, his posthumous biography was disingenuously hacked together using prophecies from the Old Testament as a means to appeal to the Jewish people.

What is your favourite lie that Jesus ‘told’ from the bible?

Simply, the one that proves he was a phoney – the promise to return before his early followers (the then “current generation”) would “experience death”. Unequivocally and irrefutably, this proves Jesus to be a false prophet. And the Jews picked him as much from the start, but it would appear that 200,000,000 Americans remain a little slow on the uptake.

Do you have a favourite character from the New Testament?

Judas. You’ve got to feel sorry for this fall guy. He played his part in the whole Jesus myth, but then gets brutally murdered by God, his intestines blown apart. So much for no Jew left behind, huh? I mean, Judas helped the Romans arrest Jesus, and had Jesus not been arrested, there’d have been no trial. No trial, no crucifixion. (Remembering Jesus had said he had to die in order to save humanity) No crucifixion, no resurrection. No resurrection, no Christianity. But a supposedly forgiving God then splatters him. It’s all utter nonsense, plain and simple.

I personally love reading your regular blog posts on your website www.cjwerleman.com, but for those who don’t subscribe, why should they?

Because it’s fair and balanced. Not sure if that slogan is already taken, but it’s a good one. Whenever I write an article, I ask myself what would Glenn Beck do, and then do the opposite. It’s a straight forward mantra for living a mentally healthy life.

I particularly enjoy the regular tweets from your twitter persona @Rationalists. Where are you going to take your bite-sized comedy?

Is this a backhanded compliment? Are you implying my comedy falls short of an adequate meal? If so, then that’s probably a fair call.

I love Twitter. I love that you can create a punch line in 140 characters or less. I love that people have the option of un-following me when my jokes bomb. That kind of keeps me on edge. And I like pressure, except whenever someone is standing too close to me at a urinal. 

How many twitter followers would you need to consider yourself a success (keeping in mind that Lady Gaga has 5.5million)?

Well, for the past few months, I have been averaging 20-30 new followers per day. So if that pick up rate continues, I should hit Lady Gaga’s number by the year 2250. And to be honest, if I make it to that age, I will care very little for Twitter followers, I will be more impressed, however, if medical science will provide me the ability to sustain an erection.

If you put all of your hate towards god into loving god, do you think that you would be a better person?

Not at all, in fact, the opposite. If I became more concerned with loving God, I’d become more concerned with the self-obsession of making it to the celestial afterlife (pleasing him), and therefore less concerned with whatever small contribution I can make to ensure a better life with the one life we have here on earth. After all, if you believe in the Book of Revelation, how can you not see that global warming is anything but a positive sign?

Finally, why should people buy your book?

Because I make a $1 each copy sold. You’re not going to print that, right?

Ok, here goes a shameless piece of self-promotion. I like to think my books make what is largely the exclusive pursuit of theologians and high fluting, badly dressed university professors, accessible to people that would ordinarily not bother to pick up a book that examines religious faith. Religious beliefs should be exposed and made fun of, because they’re darn funny and illogic. More than that, we have allowed the protectors of these ludicrous beliefs to play too large a part in our day-to-day lives and politics for far too long. I believe with some certainty, the more that people become cognizant of these beliefs and doctrines, the closer we as a society will come to laughing the believers out of relevancy. Hello, modernity. Hello, the wonders of healthy secular societies such as Sweden, Norway, and Denmark. Goodbye, Taliban controlled Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, and Iran.

 

Henk V

Henk V

Thursday 30th September 2010 | 12:01 PM
7 total kudos

Look, you can say what you like CJ but you are taking an adoptive position here. A little squiz of the literature at the time indicates that its entirely unlikely that such an individual existed. Jesus then is reduced to absurdity not a reason to ridicule

The premise of Jesus lying and having your attributes definitely shows that you are actually accusing the tradition of being incorrect. Even a nihilist sees this as an untenable argument.

Now, picking on poor old Yahweh is pretty much short changing Jakes readership as well. Which Yahweh are you talking about and seeing he is just another Baal, which Baal? Crikey's, notice the Jake you interviewed hasn't got a permanent limp, two wives and a predilection for lentil and lamb soup?

You are doing exactly the same as the quantum christians are doing, reinventing the tradition for argument's sake.


Still, the money must be OK. Need a bed partner? I am a quality beer and 8 hours a day in the kitchen kind of guy.


Please preface your arguments before letting our rusty lime quarterback start throwing hail mary's that you have to receive. Who knows, baby bear may actually argue the tradition with you (rather than supernatural or quantum gods).

The very few times that he is honest enough to do it, he lets his honesty gland be exposed.

Cheers and keep it up!

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Henk V

Henk V

Thursday 30th September 2010 | 12:07 PM
7 total kudos

PS yeah sure, lucifer-venus is also venus- halal where as tying ha-satan from his role as tester right till mid revelation is tenuous.

None really pin satan down as Dr Evil. Thats a later tradition.

The casting of lucifer is the forgiveness for christians, no longer to be tempted. Its pretty pointless tempting the spawn of your own tradition. Its not because Lucifer is a particular nasty and very tenuous cast Ha-Satan as the advisor walked the earth and entered the fathers domain at will or Yahweh's domain and El's domain at will etc etc etc

Ha-Satan was wisdom.

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Jake Farr-Wharton

Jake Farr-Wharton

Saturday 2nd October 2010 | 02:17 PM
202 total kudos

...in response to this comment by Henk V. So basically what you're saying Henk, is "Jesus isn't evidentially supported, so get over it".

While I agree with you in principle, 2 billion people don't care about this and as such, it's pertinent to dissect the specific claims and refute them... and poke them with a stick, urinate on them and if you get enough time, attach electrodes to their testicles and light up the christmas tree.

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Jake Farr-Wharton

Jake Farr-Wharton

Saturday 2nd October 2010 | 02:17 PM
202 total kudos

...in response to this comment by Henk V. So basically what you're saying Henk, is "Jesus isn't evidentially supported, so get over it".

While I agree with you in principle, 2 billion people don't care about this and as such, it's pertinent to dissect the specific claims and refute them... and poke them with a stick, urinate on them and if you get enough time, attach electrodes to their testicles and light up the christmas tree.

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Henk V

Henk V

Saturday 2nd October 2010 | 03:07 PM
7 total kudos

Yes its perfectly ok to refute claims. The book should be called "somebody lied and blamed a guy called Jesus".

As I said, saying jesus is lying is an adoptive position allowing a childish argument to cut you down every time. You then have to provide evidence. Back to the position; which jesus was it someone else, was it just confirmation bias of events 10 years to 50 years previous?

If you haven't got a position, you cant argue it.

Dont worry, Baby bear and Goldilocks got of very lightly because they only know how to parrot text, not investigate.

I expect an atheists argument to be tight and researched.

I do the same sort of things to mythologists and scholars who liken passages of the "holy" texts to Homers (etc [and if a real singular homer existed]) musings. Its the language of a shared mythology. Its not one phrase that miraculously could be said to prove jesus existed (ie.. the bar abba argument)

Unless you respect the text, you'll only glean what you want. If you actually study it and bear a modicum of memory (or an awfully good set of notes) things leap at you on every page. I personally respect a lot of "straight" scholars. If only that they save me a hell of a lot of time to establish my position of my favourite issues.


Keep up the ha-satan's work. Its pure and gets you a quality system for your lab!

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Jake Farr-Wharton

Jake Farr-Wharton

Saturday 2nd October 2010 | 03:55 PM
202 total kudos

...in response to this comment by Henk V. Seblantics.

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Henk V

Henk V

Saturday 2nd October 2010 | 04:07 PM
7 total kudos

True, but the accusations of Yahweh's bad habits can be directly fired at Baal or Shamash. All three had covenants!

As I've maintained all along;
1) religion is reinvented to suit the believer (look at the recent spate of a supernatural Jesus and a buddy style christianity).
2) religion is reinvented to suit the culture (no explanation necessary).
3) Of all the ancient religions, only the priestly Judaism, maintained a covenant between Judah (to the exclusion of israel) and Yahweh (to the exclusion of other gods) yet could not reinvent it so the people practiced similarly.

On three, had they been succesful there would have been a christianity. After all, pre Christian thought is clearly studied.

So for us to pick on biblical characters bad habits, christians have forgotten them. They have new gods that you or CJ cant attack. They just believe they are in the bible.

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Henk V

Henk V

Saturday 2nd October 2010 | 04:26 PM
7 total kudos

errata;
On three, had they been succesful there would never have been a christianity. After all, pre Christian thought is clearly studied.

apologies

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Not a Member!

palthiel

Saturday 27th August 2011 | 06:03 AM

you dont know what ya talking about fuck you

Not a Member!

lozcfdvfg

Saturday 27th August 2011 | 06:05 AM

...in response to this comment by palthiel. do you go to church

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Muddie

Saturday 27th August 2011 | 02:43 PM

yep, constructive having an argument. Its a disease amongst the religious

Not a Member!

Henk V

Saturday 27th August 2011 | 02:45 PM

yep..I'd argue with myself

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