PopeWatch - Days 1-3
Tony Fyler 8 comments
We've never had a State Visit by a Pope in the UK. Probably all stems from that malarkey with Henry VIII divorcing wives and beheading wives and giving the fat royal finger to the Pope who told him he couldn't do that, and burning the monasteries...and the people...and all that. Tends to rather sour relations, stuff like that.
As you may have heard, we've thrown away those several hundred years of big royal finger this week, and the British taxpayer will be footing the bill (that's £20 million to you sir, ker-ching!) to get the big Papal cheese over here for a State Visit.
Now, I've heard, during my more vocal atheistic moments, that one should respect one's hosts. If going to their house, for instance, you shouldn't point out that their beliefs are hopelessly, catastrophically stupid. (Shrugs) I've never seen it myself - facts are facts wherever you are, but hey, that's what I've been told. Turns out though that me and Benedict XVI are like that - he appears to agree that there's nothing wrong with going to someone's house, whipping up your cassock and pissing in their punch.
Day One - He arrived, and harrangued his audience (including the Queen - technically his equal, being both Head of State and Head of a Church) about our history of 'Anti-Catholicism' - (alright fine, so a Catholic hasn't been able to sit on the throne for a few hundred years...Jeez, some people know how to hold a grudge!) - annnnnd added, in passing, a couple of comments about the 'rise of extreme atheism.' That's the Nazis he was talking about incidentally - extreme atheists, every one of 'em, clearly, the bastards. Naturally of course, what he was seeking to do with this vapid rewriting of history was to paint the rise of modern, open atheism as equivalent to the rise of the Nazis. That was a start that even the most fawning of our national papers couldn't help but see.
On the same day, one of the major cardinals that was due to accompany the Pope pulled out on the grounds that landing at London Heathrow was like 'landing in a thrid-world country.' Now that's how to win friends and influence the fuck out of people...
Day Two - Big day for the pointy-hatted one. He criticised gay people for...well, for being gay, essentially, and authorities for gay marriage and gay adoption concessions. Met the Archibishop of Canterbury, and then, in a roomful of political leaders past and present, told everyone that Catholic institutions should be allowed to run themselves by the mark of their own conscience - in other words, keep your noses the fuck out of my churches, my orphanages, my people's lives, and bollocks to your secular authority.
Oh, and while we're about it, what the hell do you think you're about, passing legislation that puts equality of opporuntiy above the supremacy of religion? You wanna watch yourself, ya third-worlders, or I'll bitchslap ya with my mitre!
Day Three - Day Three was FUN!
On Day Three, two things happened. He held a mass open-air vigil in Hyde Park, so shedloads of believers came in to be blessed by the touch of his Noodly...no, wait, wrong nonsense...but you get the point. Meanwhile, 20,000 people - including me - took to the streets to protest the Pope, the cost of hosting him, and pretty much to have a good old bitch about the visit of a little bit of the 14th century to our evolved 21st century world.
What will Days 4 and 5 hold? So far, he's told lies about atheists, told gay people they're evil, his cardinal has called the country he's visiting 'third-world', and he's told the secular government of the country it shouldn't interfere in Catholic business. What's next, burning down a Mosque and mooning the National History Museum?
Monday 20th September 2010 | 06:18 PM
Hey Friendo - ah, slightly confused reports there - the lad held his vigil in Hyde Park with 10,000 of the faithful. We faithless buggers STARTED marching from Hyde Park, and ended up in Downing St, where a bunch of clever people gave speeches, including Prof Dawkins and Geoffrey Robinson (prominent human rights lawyer), and a victim of sex-abuse by a Catholic priest...That particularly was pretty moving.
We marching buggers STARTED as ten thousand. By the time I got to Downing St (I was in the front), the number had grown to 12,000+. By the end of it, numbers were being estimated at 20,000, hence the number in my piece ;o).
Cost the taxpayers of Britain between 15-20 million pounds, yeah, all while every section of our society is facing severe cutbacks - health, housing, social security, employment opportunity, every damn thing you care to name.
Boy, we're happy...
...in response to this comment by . Is that you Tony?
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Tony Fyler
Monday 20th September 2010 | 08:43 PMYeah, sorry man - logged in, started the comment, got called to a meeting, came back, completed the comment and it'd logged me out, but still posted.
Jake Farr-Wharton
Tuesday 21st September 2010 | 08:12 AMTony... you're awesome.
Great article!!!!!!!
Hope you hurled a rock at the cock in the frock!
Tony Fyler
Tuesday 21st September 2010 | 05:11 PMHehe...thanks Jake. No rock-hurling. Did you see the story where they actually wouldn't let a bunch of police officers (who'd been assigned to police the event!) into the vigil of the faithful, because they couldn't immediately find their correct, event-specific authorisation? Apparently, you weren't even allowed to bring your own food (in case of the Evil Sandwich-Hurling Atheists, maybe?). Sooooo getting a rock in would probably have got ya shot and crucifix-raped ;oD
Protest itself was entirely peaceful - none of the faithful (marked out by their "Pilgrim Packs" - nope, not making that up) bothered us, there was only one shouty, ranty dick in a suit, who I think just wanted to have a bit of a rant on a bright Saturday afternoon ;o)
Dunno if he was rattled by we 'aggressive secularists' or what, but after the event, the tone of his visit changed spectacularly, to being terribly sorry for the horrible abuse of children etc - without ever admitting any personal culpability for his high-powered games of Hide The Paedo. My particular favourite quote from Days 4 and 5 though was "The Voice of Christianity will not be silenced". Coming from him, that's kinda like a Klan Wizard shouting that the voice of White People will not be silenced on the election of a black man as President. It's not as if the Voice of Christianity is a) marginalised, b) a minority voice, or c) in any danger of shutting the Hell up for a while in this 'third world nation', but there he goes, flipping the truth on its ass again, and pleading victimhood against the onslaught of the vicious nazi atheists. Real piece of work, this one.
Henk V
Friday 1st October 2010 | 05:31 PMActually, totally correctly, Henry formed the church so he could get it on with Lord Pembroke.
History is often misrepresented but at least I place an honest perspective on things. Henry got what he wanted and Lord Pembroke got it too.
Henk V
Friday 1st October 2010 | 05:34 PMWe lost a state dental service for our papal visit. I can't believe the Libs did not cream Labor on that!
Friendo
Monday 20th September 2010 | 06:25 AMTony...Nice reporting! All I had heard so far was a single report on NPR, and even it had the stench of "Smooth-over, pseudo-news propaganda" It makes me sick. According to NPR, the gathering in Hyde Park was only 10,000, (not including you.) But how would anyone in the States know for sure?
Hey...how much did the pope cost the good people of England? Millions I'll bet.
My new favorite quote, and I think it applies: "The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt."
You're catholic right??
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